I feel the same. I found a good term for it, based on a book of the same name: Solastalgia. Distress over the process of loss, the knowledge of loss has not yet happened but is inevitable. Watching the wimper.
Similarly, I like the term pre-traumatic stress disorder. As you mentioned, we all have a sense of trauma. Pre-trauma is the helplessness we feel in our inability to stave off irreversible loss.