How sexual labels set us back

Allosexual. Demisexual. Solo polyamory. Pronouns. A generation of teens to thirty-somethings seem hell bent to pigeonhole themselves in what science tells us is normal sexual behavior. What can we do about it?

Am I normal?

A friend of mine once asked if she should go through with her marriage even though she has a crush on someone else. I was stunned by the naivete, almost to laughter. She honestly believed her crush was abnormal. She felt guilty for it. She worried about entering a monogamous life if she had the capacity to fall in love with others. She felt… defective.

I’ve also seen countless articles with women wondering if they are lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, or some other derivative because, despite having thus far been attracted to men, they suddenly find themselves attracted to a woman. This handwringing goes on even though science tells us women’s sexuality is delightfully fluid and capable of forming meaningful relationships with both men and women over time.

I think that’s where a lot of young people are right now — worrying about nothing. After pushing themselves to succeed, striving for a university degree, focusing on their careers, some people reach their…